Mr. Pancake arrested with hamsters in his pants

COLUMBUS, OHIO — Matthew Pancake has been arrested in Columbus this week following a spate of break-ins, which included a pet store, leaving animals loose to run around the parking lot of a strip mall.

Pancake, identified by wearing a leopard print onesie, was eventually apprehended by police following a tip from a citizen. Officers then discovered that Pancake’s pants were packed with hamsters.

An Ohio judge set Pancake’s bond at $10,000 for the break in, and remarkably no animals were harmed, despite Pancake being wrestled to the ground by police where they were overheard on body-worn cameras yelling “GET ON YOUR BELLY, PANCAKE!” They

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